“As I see it, to be a pink monkey that rolls in the mud to look safely brown, is to “nerd proof.” Truly an excellent skill, provided I copy regular folks only from awareness, not from fear.” (From the previous (Part Two) nerd essay of Sean Crawford)
To me, “Nerd proofing” would include the effort of looking around to see what regular fashions are, and diligently keeping in touch with popular culture such as by reading the entertainment section of the newspaper to be able to hold conversations at the water cooler—one of my fellow writers told Revenue Canada his television was a tax write off. “Do you really think I would ever watch TV for my own sake, for fun?” He won his case.
Nerd proofing means mingling enough in society to get one’s rough edges worn off. Nobody attends their high school reunion wearing a pocket protector. Unless maybe they work at NASA. Or at that atom bomb community in New Mexico where a fellow can wear pink, instead of a manly, boring, blend-into-the-desert, brown.
Too bad regular people don’t believe in following their individual path to Truth. Remember the (1950’s/1990’s/the oughs) when you would be accused of being a ( communist/politically incorrect/deserving to be canceled) if you didn’t believe the “party line” of society? And if you dared challenge the witch hunt then, as surely as God make green apples, “you must be a witch too!”
Even today, we live in danger of speaking heresy. Nerds and artists have always secretly known things denied by society. Shakespeare and his friends knew that Jews deserved equal rights (see Merchant of Venice) Hollywood knew the same about LGBTQ’s whose jobs, although not legally protected, would be safe in Hollywood, and now forlorn voices in the wilderness have been trying to sound the alarm about cancel culture.
If you have seen society change since, say, the year the twin towers fell, then here’s my thesis: Those who dared, to see and think, knew already that some social changes were coming. After the Web, when society believed in a reduced attention span, shorter screen texts, and the joy of soundbites, ignoring traditional newspapers and books… that’s when a some people, including nerds, were using their library cards and finding each other to have nice longer conversations.
Just like the scientists on Big Bang Theory, I too have fantasy daydreams. Imagine if in the year the twin towers fell I wore my silver time traveller suit, minus bubble helmet, to your local PTA meeting. (Parent and Teachers Association) And if I watched you, dear reader, or your cousin, scream in outrage and run some fool out the door of the PTA meeting into the cold night for the heresy of daring to suggest that someday an innocent elementary school student might earnestly request to switch genders… then peace be unto you for being a mundane regular person. Even though the social justice warriors, two decades on, would condemn you, saying that “being of your time” is no excuse. And if I, observing (two decades ago) ended up failing to fully control my look of revulsion, then I could say I was revolted at the man who dared spout heresy.
Today, without a silver suit (although I like Star Trek) and without artsy clothing, (although I’m an individual) I will conform like a visiting spy or a diplomat—while keeping my mind free. For me, getting educated about such camouflage, such nerd proofing, is part of my personal growth… Sure I might keep up a keen interest in social studies and Star Trek, but not enough to let such things totally take over my life, for I also make it my hobby to have my sensors and scanners sweeping over regular society.
…So there I was, last month, in that bar on Main Street, when at the next table a “semi-nerd” was talking to my friend Phillip. The “semi” lacked a little personal development: wearing a monotone colour, talking with monomania on his pet topic, and maybe (I forget) voicing a monotone like the classroom lecture of some socially challenged professor I heard about—All things you have to be alert for if you wish to nerd proof yourself.
After he left, and Phillip joined me at my table, I japed about the fellow. Phillip nodded, “He spends a little too much time at home alone.”
I gestured big to say, “But I’m not judging!”
“I’m not judging either! In fact, I chose my career to compensate for my introversion!”
I’m sure he did, I thought, as he smiled without showing any of the stiffness of a Big Bang Theory nerd character, at least, not showing to anyone but me, as “it takes one to know one.” Now, instead of flexing his thumbs at a warm video arcade, Philip sometimes labours outdoors to help his in-laws on their farm. He owns his own business, and diverse political party members have chosen him to run for office. Except for his thick books and numerous Star Wars figurines, one would never guess he was, like me, once a nerd. I just smiled to see him so nerd proofed, as I love seeing a guy have happy personal growth.
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The End
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Sources:
~“What You Can’t Say” is the title of a long but good web essay by Paul Graham.
http://www.paulgraham.com/say.html
~Jape:
Noun a practical joke
Verb say or do something in jest or mockery
Origin Middle English
~As for Shakespeare and Venice, I have enjoyed Harry Goldman’s full column, but today on the web I can only find “excerpts” of Goldman’ colurmn explaining why Shakespeare’s play is anti-anti-Jewish. (Not anti-semitic)
http://flatwatershakespeare.blogspot.com/2016/08/harry-golden-on-learning-from-shylock.html
Sean Crawford
December
Calgary
2023 Blog note: My “criticism-group” members, for various reasons, couldn’t meet, so I couldn’t run this one by them.
One lesson is that it is hard to get a critical mass of people who love writing nonfiction.
Another lesson is that many people find it hard to put out a nonfiction piece on a fortnightly basis.
My other nonfiction group, at our next meeting, January 22, might disband for those two reasons. (We only had two people at our previous meeting—I was away sick)
